A wise man once said that drinking alcohol is like borrowing fun from tomorrow.
Never does this ring more true than when you have had the unlucky misfortune of seeing your stomach lining in reverse action.
Asides from painkillers, and bucket loads of Berocca and Lucozade, we’ve researched of seven ways you can hopefully ease that throbbing headache and dry heaves. That you might actually enjoy. Just because we know the struggle is real.
1. Line Your Stomach
You have no excuse when there are such savoury delights as The Christmas Burger at Bootleggers – consisting of Turkey Breast, Gammon, Pork stuffing, Gravy, Cranberry sauce & Lettuce – not to line your stomach before going out in Belfast.
You’ve probably heard your mum/dad/more sensible other half waffling on about how dangerous it is to go out on an empty stomach. Whilst we used to shut the bedroom door in an ill-fated attempt to tune them out, it turns out there is truth to their logic.
If you eat a greasy meal before you go out the fat will help to line the walls of your stomach, which slows down the rate of alcohol absorption (note, it doesn’t stop it, just slows down) which means you’ll be less likely to wake up with a splitting headache and crippling nausea. And regret.
2. Stay Light
As you’ve probably already noticed from previous ‘social experiments’, different types of alcohol produce different types of hangover.
This is apparently down to the congeners in the drink, something which is produced when the alcohol is fermented. Basically the more there are the more filthy your hangover is likely to be.
As a rule, there are more congeners in darker drinks such as red wine, whiskey or navy rum. White wine, vodka and gin on the other hand contain much less, so are a much better idea. But hey, don’t let us encourage you.
3. Eat (Again)
Eating, even if it seems like the worst idea in the world, is really important for getting you on the road to recovery when you are in the midst of hangover hell. You can’t eat just anything, but there are a few options.
Depending on how bad you feel, eggs or a fry up are a great option as they help replace fatty acids and break down the alcohol in your liver. Check out our Top Ten Places For A Fry In Belfast if you’re really not up for cooking (and let’s face it- who is?)
If you’re feeling super delicate though steer clear; this could just make you feel sick.
A safer option to get you going is some mild flavoured carbohydrates such as toast or crackers, which should give you a boost without upsetting your fragile stomach too much.
Drinking too much can also deplete your potassium levels so eating some banana or potatoes in the morning will also help. We always find reaching for the Salt and Vinegar crisps works a treat, too.
4. Drink More
No, unfortunately we’re not talking Hair of the Dog. But hey, if the thought of drink doesn’t cause you to rush to the nearest puke station and you’re off work for about a week, be our guest…
But in our experience the delayed hangover just returns – with a vengeance.
A glass of delicious fruit juice helps by giving you a sugary kick and energy, as well as getting rid of the toxins in your body whilst replacing some of the essential minerals you’ve lost.
Milk will work well to replace the calcium you’ve lost, while ginger tea (or even just ginger on its own) can help with sickness.
Another option is drinking boiled water with honey and lemon. It will help boost your blood sugar and vitamins. It tastes amazing, too.
5. Wash It Off
Freshening up can do wonders for your mind.
But it’s particularly helpful for erasing hideous whiffs of stale smoke and alcohol from the night before (which just loves to cling to our hair…)
Baths are particularly ideal if you don’t even possess the energy/ ability to stand up straight for longer than 11 minutes.
6. Sleep Off That Hangover
One of the major side effects of drinking is the disruption of your sleep cycle, which is why you can still feel brutal (to put it mildly) even if you did get a decent amount of sleep.
For maximum effect, we recommend you just sleep some more. Let’s face it, you’re not going to be productive anyway, you might as well accept it and face the world afresh the next day.
7. Actually Watch Netflix & Chill
For when you eventually wake up – distract yourself by dedicating hours of your valuable time to old Friends re-runs on Comedy Central or a new TV show on Netflix. But always avoid your reflection on the laptop screen. It’s almost enough to make you want to re-evaluate your life…