My name’s Graeme and I like beer.
Part of its appeal is its alcoholic properties which allow me to unwind and escape the seriousness of the every day grind, occasionally to the point where I forget where I live.
So imagine my horror when faced with a bottle of wine with absolutely zero potency. Its name is Eisberg and its purpose is to allow those who can’t have alcoholic drinks to feel part of the crowd on a night out.
Apparently there are loads of different reasons for people not drinking, apart from the obvious one of being hungover.
Non-drinkers could be watching their health, they may have fallen pregnant or maybe these brave souls are just going Sober for October. Some cite religion as their reason for abstinence and if you’ve ever heard a outwardly religious person in full flow it’s probably better they don’t add alcoholic into the mix.
Eisberg is distributed in Northern Ireland by United Wine Merchants and comes in four flavours – Sauvignon Blanc, Rose, Chardonnay and Cabernet Sauvignon. It’s made in exactly the same way as normal wine, but with the alcohol gently removed, and put to good use elsewhere I hope.
Not that I’m a calorie watcher but the Eisberg wines weigh in as low as 26 calories per 125ml serving. I’m told that’s brilliant.
What I like most about this non-alcoholic tipple is that you’d have no idea that it hasn’t got any alcohol in it. Therefore, sipping it from a wine glass and having the craic from your mates, you’re almost tricked into thinking you’re getting drunk, right up to the point you confess your undying love for a former housemate.
The non-alcoholic nature of this wine raises another question: is it acceptable to drink Eisberg in work?
I can just picture it – the MD walking past my desk as I swig the dregs of a bottle of alcohol-free Cabernet Sauvignon and belch approvingly. Then, later in the boardroom, trying to convince him that what I’ve just drunk is the equivalent of a blackcurrant cordial.
My case wouldn’t be helped if he checked my drawers and found four empty bottles of alcohol-free vodka.